New Life Live: September 28, 2015


Topics: Forgiveness, Gaslighting, Christian Walk
Hosts: Steve Arterburn, Dr. Sheri Keffer, Milan Yerkovich

Caller Questions:

  1. How does someone forgive if they have a spirit of bitterness and offense?
  2. What are practical tools to overcome the effects of gaslighting from my ex-husband?
  3. Are we obligated to forgive unbelievers like murderers?

Suggested Resources:
Healing Is a Choice

Here is the Women in the Battle workshop testimony Steve read on the radio today:

My husband had an affair with the wife of our pastor. I was told to keep quiet by my husband, the pastor, his wife, and other board members, or I would bring the whole church down. I have been so sad, angry, hurt, rejected by my husband and my church. I have lost trust in most anyone that has to do with a church.

This weekend has been so freeing. I am not crazy, ugly, worthless, unloved. Although I am sad for the other women in this battle, I am so grateful to have heard their stories and to know there are others like me needing help! I got that help and I feel ready to go on with my life.

I am leaving this workshop with positive thoughts and feelings. I feel like I am ready to continue working on my marriage. But mostly, that I am a child of the one true King! – Julie

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  1. Regarding being saved and having unforgiveness in your heart. I believe if you carry unforgiveness or any sin you are addicted to or practicing, you have to check if you are really saved.

    • Really Yolanda?! And how would you suggest someone “checks” to see if they are saved?? I think it would be helpful to learn more about the topic of Sanctification.

  2. You accept Christ because you understand what he actually did for you. He saved you from hell even though you don’t deserve it. It should create a feeling of humility enough to not want to quickly judge others knowing you yourself have been forgiven. Maybe some people judge their sins smaller than others and don’t see that God sees all sins equally.

    I am learning to remember my own sins before I attack others..

  3. Faith, file a report on

  4. Regarding the last caller, I would have added to my question: what about eye for an eye, etc. Just like raising kids, they need to learn right from wrong, so to forgive a person who ‘knows not what they do’ enables them to continue doing as they did, unless there are consequences to what they do. There are very ignorant people who don’t believe in God, and are not afraid of consequences. They live reckless and I would say do not forgive on their behalf, to enable them, but only for your own benefit. For me part of ‘forgiving’ would be that I expose them to everyone so it doesn’t happen again. I think most people would agree that to let evil, murderers, liars, and immoral go on to hurt others would definitely enable them, and this is NOT Biblical. In the Catholic religion there is a ritual of confession in order to repent. People who have repented also have a need to see others repent and not let them continue to hurt others in their reckless evil lives. This is something I would have to do, or I would not forgive myself!

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